Let's start this post out with some simple math...the kind they sadly neglect to teach kids in any Memphis City School not named White Station...
How many minutes are in an NBA basketball game? (Pause...) 48 minutes!
How many games are in an NBA season? Guesses? 82 games!
How many players can a basketball team put on the court at once? 5!
How many shots did the Memphis Grizzlies attempt last season? (No answer...) 6,311.
How many shots did Rudy Gay, O.J. Mayo, Zach Randolph, and Allen Iverson take, combined, last season? 4,252. (Note: Allen Iverson only played in 57 games because he quit the Pistons early...if he had played,say, 75 games, the total would be 4, 615)
Final Question: What is 6,311 minus 4,615?
Final Answer: 1,696.
So, Memphis Grizzlies fans (if you're still out there) this is a ballpark estimate of how many shots will NOT be taken by Iverson, Randolph, Gay and Mayo this year.
That number of remaining shots almost disappears if you give Mike Conley and Marc Gasol their career averages.
So, Mr. Thabeet, welcome to Memphis. This year, we will give you 57 shots.
Sammy Young, it's a tough economy...we're thinking 14.
DeMarre Carroll, how many shots did you take against Memphis in the Sweet 16 last year? 11? Okay, that sounds about right...
Here's the point: if you look at the Grizzlies' signing of Allen Iverson strictly from a numerical standpoint, it doesn't quite add up. There's only one basketball, and it can only pass through one pair of hands at once.
Look at it theoretically, and the final analysis doesn't get much better.
"We're gonna build through the draft", "Three year plan", "Our focus is the development of young talent"...those statements now carry about as much weight as a Willie Herenton mayoral resignation statement. Young draftees will be sitting on the bench, Mayo will be fighting to get the ball, and Rudy Gay will be faking injuries like it's his job.
Geoff Calkins said it best in the Commercial Appeal: the Grizzlies have become a freak show.
Teams have gotten away with only having one thug in the past. Alone, Iverson may have behaved. But he has more to feed off of than an all-you-can-eat buffet in the hefty Zach Randolph.
Randolph says he's a changed man; he took his family to Disneyworld this summer.
I can't wait to go with my family to Disneyworld when I come home for the Christmas holidays. I won't have to go any further than the FedExForum. They called the Pyramid the "Tomb of Doom." I heard they want to rename the Forum the "Tower of Terror".
Iverson will be in Memphis for one year, in which he will cry, complain, and get kicked out of more than one Beale Street bar.
Come April, I think Memphis fans will want him kicked out of the arena just off Beale Street.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
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